At the end of the day we want to feel good. But let me first explain to you what creating a life to feel the way you want to feel isn’t. It isn’t ignoring your negative feelings. It isn’t numbing out your bad feelings nor is it pretending that you are not feeling that way or positively affirming your way out of a situation. That’s a big fat NO to all of that.
Sometimes negative feelings are appropriate. When you have lost someone or have missed an opportunity we need to feel sadness, pain, hurt or frustration. This is the part of being human that can be difficult but this is also the opportunity to discover and uncover what isn’t working well in our lives or clarifies what we do want to experience.
Choosing to feel the way you want to feel is a different take on setting goals or as Danielle La porte says: Setting Goals with Soul. All of the choices we make in life, consciously or not, all the goals and aims to strive and achieve are really about what we think we will feel in the end. The problem with the standard idea of goal setting is that the thing we want to achieve may not actually feel the way we thought it would. Maybe that is because we are conditioned to think that life looks a certain way. I would also go as far to say that is the main reason why a lot of us don’t actually follow through and achieve what we think we want to achieve. Because we are just not feeling it, we are thinking it.
By choosing how we want to feel first and then asking yourself “What will I do to feel the way I want to feel?” you will feel more aligned with what it is about you in your life that makes you feel good. It will clarify what you want and what you don’t want for your life. It will give you a sense of belonging to yourself and the way you want to live.
So what does this look like? Say you wanted to feel more “Balanced”, you would ask yourself, “What will I do today to feel more balanced” and then your goals become: drink more water, go to bed by 10pm, wear the balanced blend to connect me with this intention and catch up for a coffee with Tanya. Rather than striving and pushing to do all the things, you do what you can to feel the way you want to feel and when you spend your days asking yourself this you will find that you are living the life you want, building the dreams you want with ease and less proving. Because it feels good, it feels right which sustains you when the doing gets tough.